Pronouns

I recently got called out on Facebook for not using someone's pronouns and "dead naming" a family member. I didn't respond. Didn't have the energy plus this person usually just deletes my comments so I didn't bother.

But I thought I would respond here on why I choose not to use someone's preferred pronouns and why I won't use my family's members changed name. Truth matters and hopefully this truth will be accepted in the loving way it is intended.

I believe there are two sexes and one gender associated with each sex. I believe this both because science dictates it and because of my Christian faith: that God created us male and female, wonderful and unique. And it is in that binary we see the expression of God as his image bearers. In men we see the fatherly and good male nature of God and in women we see the motherly and good female nature of God. All the time knowing that God is Spirit, we see some aspects of his divine nature in the joining of this binary into one unit as males and females marry.

To call someone by pronouns or names that counter their god given body and sex is wrong, maybe evil. It is most certainly not loving. Affirming this person in his or her confusion is anything but loving. What is loving is being truthful and desiring to see this person find healing and wholeness by reconciling her feelings to her God given body. I don't do it maliciously or for the sake of conflict. In fact, I try to find ways to address her in a way that uses no names or pronouns for the sake of keeping the peace. It's just not always possible to do so. And in the times I can't, I will continue to refuse to affirm the lies holding her in bondage.

I guess today is International Non-Binary Day. No, I won't be wishing my family member a good day or offer congratulations thus affirming the lie. Instead, I will continue to pray for repentance and healing for her, as I have done daily the past year, that she finds wholeness and reconciliation in her body, and that she comes to know the depths of Christ love toward her and His ability to transform lives. I am a witness to this myself, in my own changed life. If she reads this, I hope she knows I love her.